I NEED SOMEONE TO GIVE FEEDBACK FOR THESE PARAGRAPHS RIGHT NOW! I AM GIVING BRAINLIEST

Directions: Read and analyze the 4 paragraphs from our classes' Personal Narrative assignment.
In a Google Doc or Slides analyze EACH paragraph by identifying the errors and providing specific feedback on how to improve each one. The paragraph must have a triumph.
*You are NOT allowed to inquire about the author of the paragraphs. This will result in you losing points off YOUR grade.*

PARAGRAPHS:
1. A time l got a great Victory was in Florida, I was playing football
games with my team and I. We needed to make it to the
championship so we played our first 3 games and won those games.
So when we advanced to the championship it wasnt really easy. We
went to overtime and they played their drive. They didn't score most
likely because their touchdown kept getting called back. Then when
we played our drive we scored ended up winning the rings.

2. A time l got a great Victory was in Florida, I was playing football
games with my team and I. We needed to make it to the
championship so we played our first 3 games and won those games.
So when we advanced to the championship it wasnt really easy. We
went to overtime and they played their drive. They didnt score most
likely because their touchdown kept getting called back. Then when
we played our drive we scored ended up winning the rings.

3.When I was younger, about 3 or 4 years old. My parents had a car accident with my moms old red van. We had been going to a store to get some clothes in Greenbelt, and on the Beltway. Someone that my mom knew crashed into us. None of us were severely hurt, but the next day we had to go to the hospital for a check-up. I ended up being in a cast for about 1 week and a half, as doctors said that I broke my arm. I was still able to do things with that arm, just couldn’t do as much as I usually would. For example, I could feed myself and others, but couldn’t do some at-home exercises like pushups.

4.My challenge that led to a triumph was when my family came
to stay at my house for a couple hours and I could not think
of a challenge that led to a triumph until they left I realized
that they were a distraction and I could not figure out how to
complete this assignment then I realized that one challenge
that led to triumph was when I got a bad grade and I figured
it was my focus and I changed spaces to do class in my
house I am more productive I get my stuff done and I feel
more relaxed and excited for the next day.And that's my
personal narrative.

IF SOMEONE COULD PLEASE SEND FEEDBACK ON ALL OF THESE BY MIDNIGHT, IT WOULD BE GREAT! I NEED FEEDBACK ON THESE AS MY ASSIGNMENT. I AM GIVING BRAINLIEST!

Answer:

1. I suggest ending the "A time l got a great Victory was in Florida" Ending the sentence and starting a new one. Any number below ten should be written out. (Three not 3) Comma after so. And add apostrophe. (So, when we advanced to the championship it wasn't really easy.) Last sentence needs to be redefined. Does not make sense to say "we scored ended"?

2.  Add spaces. (Obviously) How do you quietly storm out of a room? The adjectives do not make sense. He started to own? I suggest finding a better word.

3. Again, anything under ten needs to be written out. Confused by what this sentence means, "We had been going to a store to get some clothes in Greenbelt, and on the Beltway." Instead of 1 week and a half say a week and a half. I suggest saying the arm I broke, instead of that arm. Very good otherwise!!

4. I suggest cutting out everything that said you could not think of a triumph. It just confused the reader. The punctuation is also bad. Add more commas and get rid of the run-on sentences.

the proverb says, As you (sow/so) so shall you reap.​

QUESTION 1

1. Correct the following business messages keeping the 7C's of effective communication in consideration.
i. Revise the following message for conciseness:
In this time of the day, we are sending this announcement to let everyone know that new medicines ordered by the hospital which are mentioned on the list will be available from next month.

ii. Revise the following message for correctness:
Careem has recently launched their service for ‘Wedding Celebrations’ the brand manager was asked to write an e-mail to offer discounted packages and inform of the hospitality it is about to set for. However, the drafted e-mail had a lot of errors. Here’s the sample e-mail content for you:

Dear Customers
We are very upset about lunching a wen project for your needs that are endless we at careem are not ready to lunch our services for wedding packages but is ready to occupy space for celebrations we would like you to uses our news services and be happiest always.
Best
Careem

iii. Rewrite the following message with tact and courtesy:
Sarim,
I wanted to let you know that I don’t appreciate how your team always monopolizes the discussion at our weekly meetings. I have a lot of projects, and I really need time to get my team’s progress discussed as well! So far, thanks to your department, I haven’t been able to do that. Can you make sure they make time for me and my team next week?
Thanks,
Hassan

Lmk your opinions
If your parents are separated, should the child have a say in who they want to spend their Christmas with?

HAS ANYONE DONE A TASK ON SULI BREAKS - 'WHY I HATE SCHOOL BUT LOVE EDUCATION'
and you had to write PEE paragraphs on why he pauses at certain areas

What solutions can help nick and Andrea get their resources ?

Which of the of the following quotes best supports the answer to Part A?
A. “'Hope' is the thing with feathers" (Line 1)
B. “That perches in the soul — / ... And never stops — at all” (Lines 2-4)
C. “sore must be the storm — / That could abash” (Lines 6-7)
D. “I’ve heard it in the chilliest land — / And on the strangest Sea — ” (Lines 9-10)

I need help before 4:00 PM today please.​

27 Complete the sentences with the correct form of will and the verb in parent
1
(tell) If you_______
her the truth, she______
believe you
2 (not return) If they_______
his wallet, he________
get lund
3 (cheat) If she_______
in the test. she_________
get a good
(promise) If I_______
to do something, I________
do it:​

Write an apology letter about plagiarism with the word “Honesty”. (NO GOOGLE ANSWERS PLEASE)

How does Alice from Alice in wonderland change trough out the story

The summary of blue by Francesca Lia book

Which statement best describes a literary analysis?
A literary analysis combines the writer's own opinions about a text with evidence from the text.
A literary analysis contains only facts from a text and should not contain opinions.
A literary analysis requires research from many sources of information to support an argument.
O A literary analysis summarizes a text and makes a recommendation for others to read it.

A poet's use of myths to help get her or his ideas across to the reader is very misleading, because the reader will logically project the characters in the myth as if they were characters in the poet's poem.
A.True
B.False

what are key course concepts? are they just basic terms of vocab you would have learned in class? (pls don't give a copy/paste definition from google)

The landlady creative writing
Discuss the role of foreshadowing in the story. How does the author prepare the reader for the ending from the very first page? (20marks)

write a letter to the school principal for reduction of fees as my father has lost his job.​

Read the excerpt from The Diary of a Young Girl. “The van Daans are going with us. There will be seven of us altogether.” Silence. We couldn't speak. The thought of Father off visiting someone in the Jewish Hospital and completely unaware of what was happening, the long wait for Mother, the heat, the suspense – all this reduced us to silence. Which word best describes the mood of this excerpt? tense excited angry calm

How do you know that Robert is a round, static
character? Check the three best choices.
He has few different character traits.
He has many different character traits.
He doesn't change significantly over the
course of the novel.
He changes and grows over the course of the
novel.
He is complex and inconsistent at times,

Read the excerpt from "Broken Chain."

Eventually he [Alfonso] grew bored and went outside with an old gym sock to wipe down his bike, a ten-speed from Montgomery Ward. His thumbs were tired and wrinkled and pink, the way they got when he stayed in the bathtub too long.

Why does Soto most likely include the imagery of Alfonso’s thumbs in this passage?

to show that Alfonso spends his time doing unimportant tasks
to develop the idea that Alfonso cares a lot about appearances
to emphasize that Alfonso does not know when to give up
to illustrate that Alfonso does not like getting himself dirty

If you were going to analyze a claim, what would you do

Which is the best retelling of this passage?
A.
A third-grade class found an alligator snapping turtle. The class is keeping the turtle as a pet.
B.
A third-grade class is keeping an alligator snapping turtle as a pet. Byron Lee is the teacher.
C.
Alligator snapping turtles look like dinosaurs. They can grow to be big and very dangerous.
D.
Alligator snapping turtles can grow to be over 200 pounds. A third-grade class found one.

Read the excerpt from a speech by US Secretary of Education Arne Duncan. What is the speech’s purpose?

A.
to inform the country what students are learning in their local schools
B.
to gain support for a law that would improve student achievement
C.
to explain the roles of teachers in creating a better learning environment
D.
to support a law that requires children to begin learning at a very young age


plz help

PART A: Which of the following best states a central idea expressed within the letter? A. The people of Juana are full of health and vitality because of the quality of the water flowing through the island. B. Spain can learn from the mannerisms and culture of the people inhabiting the islands. C. The islands are suitable for colonization, and Spain will flourish as a result of the resources available. D. God has granted Spain the divine right to conquer the islands.

Why is the sequential order text structure of paragraph 3 important to this article?

Cheko had to paint a poster. The length of the poster was twice of the breadth. The perimeter of the poster was 132 cm. Find the area of the poster.

Fill in text!
Help!!! ​

I WILL GIVE BRAINLEST TO CORRECT ANSWER Waking is not the most exciting form of exercise a person can take on for fitness. Yet it is low impact and requires no fancy equipment. That makes walking a simple activity for those new to
exercise. Waking is less kely
than other exercises to cause injury to leg tendons and muscles. All it requires is a good pair of sneakers-no cables, stylish outfits, or weights required. Of coun
person could increase the benefit of a workout by adding weights or speed walking.
Explain whether the main idea is explicit or implicit in this paragraph.

A: It is explicit because it is directly stated in the paragraph.

B: It is explicit because it is not directly stated in e paragraph.

C: It is implicit because it is directly stated in the paragraph.

D: It is implicit because it is not directly stated in the paragraph.

Why does the map from 1507 look much different than the current map of the world?

Help please, it's too hard to do on my own I tried


Which of the following is true about American spirituals?
Question 1 options:

A. They developed during the the Civil War

B. They often contained allusions to Biblical events, figures and themes

C. They contained hidden codes pertaining to finding freedom

D. B and C

E. None of the above

2. Which line in "Go Down, Moses" most clearly states its central message?
Question 2 options:

A. "Go down, Moses"

B. "Let my people go"

C. "Thus saith the Lord"

D." Oppressed so hard, they could not stand"

3. Part A: What do the spirituals “Go Down, Moses”, “Follow the Drinking Gourd” and “Swing Low, Sweet Chariot” most clearly reveal about the slaves who originally sang them?

Question 3 options:

A. They accepted slavery as the way of the world.

B. They were often highly educated.

C. They longed for freedom.

D. They sang songs.


4. Part B: Which of the following lines support your answer to # 3?
Question 4 options:

A. “For the old man is a-waiting to carry you to freedom, if you follow the drinking gourd” (“Follow the Drinking Gourd" 185)

B. “Go down, Moses, Way down in Egypt land” (“Go Down Moses" 187)

C. “I looked over Jordan and what did I see” (“Swing Low Sweet Chariot” 188)

D. “The river bank will make a very good road” (“Follow the Drinking Gourd” 185)


5. How is war portrayed in both “Vigil Strange I Kept on a Field One Night” and “A March in the Ranks Hard-Prest, and the Road Unknown”?
Question 5 options:

A. As a glorious event

B. As brutal and ugly

C. As unexplainable

D. As something no one should participate in (all soldiers should stop fighting)

6. Consider this excerpt from "A March in the ranks Hard-Prest and the Road Unknown": Entering but for a minute I see a sight beyond all the pictures and
poems ever made,
Shadows of deepest, deepest black, just lit by moving candles and
lamps,
And by one great pitchy torch stationary with wild red flame and clouds
of smoke Based on the opening lines of “A March in the Ranks Hard-Prest and the Road Unknown”, what is the tone of this poem?
Question 6 options:

A. Mournful

B. Eerie

C. Joyful

D. Creative

7. PART A: What is the main theme, or message, of “The Gettysburg Address”?
Question 7 options:

A. It is the duty of the living to take up the cause for which the soldiers died and save the United States.

B. The Civil War was a terrible war and destructive to the continuation of the United States.

C. The dead soldiers should be commemorated and remembered.

D. Whatever the outcome, it’s just good to know the war is now over.


8. PART B: Which of the following quotes from “The Gettysburg Address” supports your answer to # 7?
Question 8 options:

A. Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure (Lincoln 184).”

B. “But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate—we can not consecrate—we can not hallow—this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract” (Lincoln 184).

C. “It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced” (Lincoln 184)



9. In “O Captain! My Captain!” Walt Whitman creates an extended metaphor. Which of the following are true about this poem?
Question 9 options:

A. The captain represents Abraham Lincoln

B. The ship represents the Confederate States

C. The port represents the end of the Civil War

D. A and C

E. All of the above

10. Which of following lines indicate how the speaker in the poem felt about the captain?
Question 10 options:

A. “Here Captain! dear father!”

B. “Exult O shores, and ring O bells!
But I with mournful tread,
Walk the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.”

C. “My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will,”

D. All of the above

All messages are sent and received through channels.
true or false