i have to post this because its hilarious, if u get offended u just dont know how dark humour works

Answer:

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Explanation:

Thanks for the points tho! Brainliest? Thanks!

Answer:

Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

I'll never forget my Granddad's last words to me just before he died. "Are you still holding the ladder?"

It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It's true. I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.

What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly a clown into the tiny car.

"I work with animals," the guy says to his date.  "That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who cares about animals. Where do you work?" "I'm a butcher," he says.

Why was the leper hockey game canceled? There was a face off in the corner.

Today was a terrible day. My ex got hit by a bus. And I lost my job as a bus driver!

"Just say NO to drugs!" Well, If I'm talking to my drugs, I probably already said yes.

I don't have a carbon footprint. I just drive everywhere.

It's important to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words 'antidote' and 'anecdote,' one of my good friends would still be alive.

What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 mph? Its butt.

Explanation:

Which of the following was designed by a person in the applied arts?

A.
a coffee pot

B.
the set of a film

C.
a famous painting

D.
a ballet

According to the lecture explanation of the painting Pope Leo X with Cardinals, what clues explain to the viewer the type of mood in the painting?

Traditional motif please​ I have limited time right now. Someone should help please

Read this excerpt from Little Brother and answer the following questions in complete sentences using proper grammar and punctuation: Marcus manages to flag down a vehicle and they get more than they bargained for... It was a military-looking Jeep, like an armored Hummer, only it didn't have any military insignia on it. The car skidded to a stop just in front of me, and I jumped back and lost my balance and ended up on the road. I felt the doors open near me, and then saw a confusion of booted feet moving close by. I looked up and saw a bunch of military-looking guys in coveralls, holding big, bulky rifles and wearing hooded gas masks with tinted face-plates. I barely had time to register them before those rifles were pointed at me. I'd never looked down the barrel of a gun before, but everything you've heard about the experience is true. You freeze where you are, time stops, and your heart thunders in your ears. I opened my mouth, then shut it, then, very slowly, I held my hands up in front of me. The faceless, eyeless armed man above me kept his gun very level. I didn't even breathe. Van was screaming something and Jolu was shouting and I looked at them for a second and that was when someone put a coarse sack over my head and cinched it tight around my windpipe, so quick and so fiercely I barely had time to gasp before it was locked on me. I was pushed roughly but dispassionately onto my stomach and something went twice around my wrists and then tightened up as well, feeling like baling wire and biting cruelly. I cried out and my own voice was muffled by the hood. I was in total darkness now and I strained my ears to hear what was going on with my friends. I heard them shouting through the muffling canvas of the bag, and then I was being impersonally hauled to my feet by my wrists, my arms wrenched up behind my back, my shoulders screaming. I stumbled some, then a hand pushed my head down and I was inside the Hummer. More bodies were roughly shoved in beside me. "Guys?" I shouted, and earned a hard thump on my head for my trouble. I heard Jolu respond, then felt the thump he was dealt, too. My head rang like a gong. "Hey," I said to the soldiers. "Hey, listen! We're just high school students. I wanted to flag you down because my friend was bleeding. Someone stabbed him." I had no idea how much of this was making it through the muffling bag. I kept talking. "Listen—this is some kind of misunderstanding. We've got to get my friend to a hospital—" Someone went upside my head again. It felt like they used a baton or something—it was harder than anyone had ever hit me in the head before. My eyes swam and watered and I literally couldn't breathe through the pain. A moment later, I caught my breath, but I didn't say anything. I'd learned my lesson. In three to five sentences, explain Marcus' current stage of identity development. Use examples from the text. As a reminder, the different stages of identity development are: (20 points)

* Identity Diffusion occurs when an adolescent does not make a commitment to any particular roles, values, or goals.

* Identity Foreclosure occurs when someone makes a commitment without considering other possibilities.

* Identity Moratorium occurs when an individual is in the midst of a crisis over a particular role or value and tries out alternatives in order to make a commitment.

* Identity Achievement occurs when someone makes a personal decision or commitment after going through a crisis and exploring his or her options.​

Type the correct answer in the box Spell all words correctly
Ronald is a professional photographer. He wants to upload his work online for his potential clients to review. However, he's worried that, by
doing this, his photos wouldn't be traceable back to him after people download them from his web page. What can Ronald do to make sure that
those downloaded photos still have his identity
Ronald can add
to the photos so that his photos store his identity?

Ronald can add ______ to the photos so that his photos store his identity.

PART A: Which sentences describes the main theme of the short story? From CHARLES by Shirley Jackson (CommonLit)

Why did Audrey flack paint still lifes

10. All of the following are advantages of illustration in instruction EXCEPT..
A. some things are easier to show than explain
B. instructions with images are cheaper to produce
C. it can be faster to look at an image than read a paragraph
D. people who do not read well or understand the language can follow them

2. Someone who creates cartoons in the first sense
is called​

Define the term monogram. Why are they used by artists?

19. Besides screens, screen printing uses...
A. wax
B. clay
C. stencils
D.typesetting

Give an example of the above and below of Greek Theogony.

What is a reason you might have taken a blurry image?

A)the shutter speed was set too slow

B)the subject you were photographing moved

C)you didn't set the focus correctly

D)All of the above

41. The resources available for digital art do not change over time.
true or false

How can you tell if a piece contains bias?
You only get the facts
You can tell what side the reporter takes
You can read quotes from others
You agree with the piece

Here is the motive:
What variation technique is used to develop the motive in measures 17 - 20?

this is for fun type as many Christmas songs as you can below my fav will get brainiest you will get 50 points as well.

Which of the following choices best explains why Wagner wrote essays under a pen name?
His pen name was more well known.
He only wrote operas under his real name.
He wanted to keep his thoughts and beliefs separate from his music.
He wanted to try a new name.

How does one become a shadow puppeteer in Chinese Shadow Puppetry?

like if you agree pls

Which of the following is a characteristic of a good netizen?
asking permission before forwarding someone's online comments
posting anonymous criticism of a classmate on a discussion board
using "txt msg" spelling in formal online communications
writing e-mails, blogs, or discussion posts in all caps

want a chance to show off your graphic design skill?

i`m holding a contest for a robIox game i`m making and i need a thumbnail. the thumbnail should look like a dark forest with a brown spider lurking around it and it should have a title with the name 'the forbidden forest'

the submisions will be on padIet so here is my padIet code:
padIet.com/timtomfan/9xjt74op887dciow

your submision is due on December 21st, good luck!

I need help with these questions

A woman is riding in a convertible car and she dies of a gunshot wound to the left shoulder. There are no bullet holes through the car or the window. How did she get shot? (IQ TEST 100 POINTS)

What is geometric motif. Please I need an answer immediately. PLEASE​

NEED HELP PLS
Who is responsible for protecting an artist's intellectual property?
a lawyer
an agent
the artist
a publishing company

the __________ was the incharge of justice under shivaji

Can someone please give me some constructive criticism I would really appreciate it, I think my art looks ok but I want to know if there's a way to improve that I haven't seen before like from another perspective on my art, thanks a lot :].​

Addie was so struck by the imagery of war and suffering in Picasso's epic painting Guernica that she had tears in her eyes. Which term best
describes Addie's response to this work of art?
temporal
subliminal
impressionistic IS THE CORRECT ANSWER.
subjective
I DONT WANT YOU TO FAIL LIKE I DID SO IM HELPING YOU your welcome✨

Question 5 of 10 In 1954, a musician named Bud Isaacs introduced a new instrument to country music. What was it? O A. the fiddle O B. the pedal steel guitar O C. the banjo O D. the Hawaiian guitar
​